In life we don’t know how we will die, or when we will die, but for others we are prepared and given no choice but to be taken from our family. Cancer is something not many people plan for, it isn’t something we can every truly understand, and no matter how hard we fight, sometimes Cancer defeats us, and with that God has taken a man that has touched so many. I only met Luis about two times, and in those two times you can tell he was an incredible man. This man meant so much to so many people. He walked into the life of my friends mom, she finally found the love her life and it saddens me to know she has lost him to the battle of cancer.
A man who touched so many lives was lost yesterday, he has left behind a wife, and children and step children, grandchildren, family and friends. Luis had a journal in which he wrote how he felt, his last entry was on Father’s Day of 2012. You can see his journal entries here: http://lceballos61.livejournal.com/. If you truly want to meet a strong man, I recommend you read his journal. He is an inspiration to us all.
Whenever you feel like your life isn’t going the way you expected, stop and be grateful for what you do have in your life. Luis taught us to stop and smell the flowers no matter how hard life hits you. He taught many never to give up and to live life to the fullest. I only hope that his family can take on his strength and that they will one day feel peace in their hearts. Today we mourn a man who was strong, a man who thought more about his own family than any other man I have ever met, and today I give thanks for knowing him, even if it was only for a short time. I give thanks to god for letting his wife and my friends have them in their lives and to love such a wonderful man. I am sorry they had to lose him to cancer and I will pray that they will get through this hard time.
I love you all and my prayers are with you. Today God took not only an incredible man, but an angel. Rest In Peace Luis, we will all miss you.
Another year has passed and every year my boyfriend and I try to go to a new City/State, this year however we loved Chicago so much last year that we decided to visit again.
Chicago has so much history and architecture, that it’s amazing. The food is great, the people are pretty great and I would probably live there if it weren’t for those dreading cold winters. So, Ill stick to vacationing where I can feel my toes.
Although we got to see a lot last year, this year we are going to see a few museums we missed, and we will probably rent a car again and head to Wisconsin for some Cheese. We aren’t the type of couple to make an itinerary, so we will just go with the flow, see what we will do on the day we do it.
If anyone from Chicago or anyone who loves and knows the city has ideas, please let me know. I will let you know how the trip went and I will try to post some pictures along the way. The app for my website doesn’t work very well, and the last time I was there I was inspired and started writing, only to lose it all, so I may refrain from writing and saving, and I will just post if I can.
Have a fabulous week. Oh and Happy Early Birthday to my wonderful boyfriend…..
I have read your blog and I have to tell you that I admire what you do and I love the advices you give, so I have brought to you my situation…
I have to mention that I am 20, married, part-time worker and college student. My husband (20 yrs old) works full-time at night, so we only see each other like 2 hrs a day, since he sleeps all afternoon long. I have gotten in a situation I hate to be in… An old crush (20 yrs old) appeared a couple of months ago, we decided to hang out one day. We went to the mall and walked around and just talked about life and what we’ve done all that time in which we didnt see each other. As the day went by I felt this amazing chemistry we had, like if we knew eachother from a long time. As the week went by we texted each other and decided to meet again ( I know this was a big mistake). We went to the zoo and after we were out of the zoo, we walked towards a little park that’s infront of the Zoo. We sat down on the grass and talked for a while, as we were talking, we ended up kissing… Since that day things have gotten more serious, we’ve met many times and had intercourse… My husband and I do not have time for each other, all he wants to do is sleep when he gets home since he is tired and I understand that. When he wakes up, its time for me to go to work and when I get off work, its time for him to go to work… My Ex-crush makes me feel like I havent felt in a long time.. last month, my Ex-crush and I thought I was preagnant, and he was very happy and willing to support me? Even though the child was not going to be raised by him. We found out I was not preagnant which was a big relief for me. I am starting to feel more than just attraction for him… I do not want to fall in love and I feel that is too late to stop what I have started… But really I can not picture my life without my husband. Even though we’ve only been married for 3 yrs, we’ve built alot of things together, credit, car, house, friends and etc., and i feel that nothing is really worth leaving my husband. I have a life with my husband, i do not want to divorce him, no one in my family has ever gotten one. I dont want to keep cheating on him, I have no idea what to do, maybe your answer will be to stop seeing my lover but really thats really hard since we are very good friends and he makes me happy, and I am now starting to have feelings for him. My lover mentioned that having a baby with me would be the best thing that could happen to him, and that confused me a lot. He says that we should try to have one, but I dont think it is right. What would be your advice?
~Too Young
My Response:
Dear Too Young;
I want to first start off by saying; Thank you so much for following my site. I hope that I can help you with what I am going to say.
I am not going to say that it is impossible to love two people at once, because it is possible, but you cannot be with two people at once, living a lie and trying to keep them both at arms reach. No one can tell you what choice to make, not even me. You have to truly see who you are truly in love with and be with that person. If you truly love your husband, you would not want to be with another man. I understand that it’s hard because of your time schedules to spend time together, but you need to communicate to your husband, and you need to try and make time for each other, or the relationship is not going to work. If you really want to make things work with your husband you need to end things with your friend. Do not take into consideration that no one in your family has ever gotten a divorce, if you aren’t in love with your husband it is better to move your separate ways now, then later down the road when you have children. It’s hard when you have a life built with someone you care for, but do you think it is okay to stay with someone just because you built credit, a house and a life with them? Life and marriage are so much more than that, and you will learn that one day. You are still young and you married young and there are many things in life you still have to experience. Do not stop yourself from doing what you want for you, because of what family or others might say. If you feel you really want to be with this other man, then you need to be honest with your husband and let him go. The fact that this man wants to have a baby with you, shows that he really cares for you, in his own way. I do not think that he will be okay with another man raising your child, I think he wants you to get pregnant because he believes this will give you the excuse to leave your husband. You are young and in my opinion, I would make sure to use birth control methods. You need to figure out what you want before bringing a child into this world. You also do not want to lie to your child about who their real father is, that is wrong on all levels. It isn’t fair to hold onto both men, when in the end you are only hurting yourself. No one can tell you which man to choose, you need to make that choice on your own. I think deep down you know the choice you want to make, I think you are just scared to make it. Life is too short to not make the choices in life that will make you happy. If you are grown up enough to get married, grown up enough to cheat, you are grown up enough to make a decision.
I feel like I’m losing control of how I feel. Sometimes I feel okay and happy and other times I am feeling like the world is passing me by and I don’t know how to make it slow down. I feel like nothing right is going on in my life, and as much as I try, I feel like I am stuck in the same place I have been in for the last few years. How do I try to get out of this rut and into making things happen?
~Feeling Lost
My Response:
Dear Feeling Lost;
It’s normal to feel lost sometimes, I think at one point in everyone’s life we sometimes wonder where our lives are going. If you feel like you are stuck, try to write down a few goals you want to finish (realistic time frame goals) before the year is over. We can not sit and wait for things to happen in life, sometimes we need to get up and push a little. If you are looking for a career change, maybe it’s time to go back to school. If you already have your education then get out there and start applying to every job that interests you. If you have the dream job and you are more concerned with financial stability, then talk to your boss about a raise or start looking for another job that will pay you more. If you just feel like you are stuck where you are, just know that you are never truly stuck. You can always move, and try something different. If you are in a relationship and you feel you are stuck there too, then talk to your boyfriend/girlfriend, see where your relationship is going. I am not sure exactly where you feel stuck, so I am just putting things out there. Feeling stuck can be draining sometimes. Sometimes we have to truly sit back and reflect on what we want to change. It isn’t going to be easy but when we push ourselves, you will be surprised at how far you can go.
I am thinking about cheating on my boyfriend with his best friend. We have been flirting recently and hung out the other day alone, we didn’t do anything but we came close to kissing. Should I see where it goes or leave it alone?
My Response:
Dear Flirt;
It is never a good idea to hook up with anyone while in a relationship, that’s one. Second, hooking up with your boyfriends best friend is probably one of the worst things a girl can do. Not only are you messing with your relationship but that’s your boyfriends friend. At this point, I can say that the best friend is not being a good friend to begin with if he’s hanging out with his best friend’s girlfriend alone and flirting. This is just temptation you don’t need. At the end of the day, the best friend gets what he wants, which is you, and at the end of the day the friendship will probably survive, and you will be the only one left alone. Don’t ruin your relationship, if you aren’t happy then break up with your boyfriend, but I repeat ‘DON’T HOOK UP WITH HIS BEST FRIEND’.
… image by: google.com/images
I haven’t written anything in a while, I have been trying to come up with things to say, but lately I have felt overwhelmed and tired. Sometimes when you are so frustrated the words just don’t come out. I’m not sure if I’m angry with the situations that have come or if I’m just tired of them. Sometimes it would be easier to just pick up and walk away, but sometimes that isn’t always the answer.
On top of the drama, I have had good things happen within the last few weeks. I finally got my Bachelor’s in Psychology (whoot whoot). And now I am taking a small break before starting my Masters Program. The masters program is an accelerated course, so I will get my Masters in a year. It will be very stressful and a lot of work, but I’m hoping it will be worth it in the end. Living in Miami it’s hard to find your way into writing/editing. Many freelance jobs do not offer that much pay. Unfortunately I have to work full time, and with that comes bills that need to be paid, I can’t just pick up and leave to work for an intern position to get that experience on my board. I have to work with what I got. I was grateful enough to know a beautiful friend of mine who helped me get an internship, working from home, so I was able to get extra experience on my board right there. I feel though, that it just isn’t enough. You would think Miami being one of the biggest cities there would be more opportunity out here, but unfortunately I see it more in New York or California, I’m not one to turn any of those options down, I love both states, however; it’s hard. My family is here in Miami and my boyfriend and I have a beautiful home we have been fixing up, it wouldn’t be easy to let that go (and I would need for my boyfriend to come with me), but these are all options that have not come up at the moment, so options that need no worry for the time being.
I like to think ahead though, and thinking ahead sometimes causes me to stress. I need a vacation. I’m looking forward to my second visit to Chicago this month. I plan on taking lots of pictures and sharing a few on here. I want to start taking more pictures, it’s relaxing and I enjoy it.
Well I know I’ve been rambling, so good night for now.
I know what it feels like
I know what it takes
I know deep inside you feel lost
A wall you have built
To let everyone out
Hoping that will make things better
Losing yourself within the doubt
When things start looking better
You sabotage your own results
Living a lie not in pleasure
You cry in bed at all costs
I know how you feel
I was there too
Not knowing who you are
Pretending to be two
Living in the dark
Not knowing where to go
Living a lie of happiness
When all you feel is alone
You don’t have to cry
You don’t have to feel alone
You don’t need to defy all the odds
You have to just let go
Let go of the sadness, of the anger and tears
Look deep inside yourself
And get rid of all your fears
Deep down there is a way
Even though you may not see
But everyone at one point feels alone
You just have to wake up and see
That although you do not want to hear it, see it or believe it
Family is always there
Because we care.
Take a moment to see who you are
Know that in the end you will go far
You have to have faith and see what we see
Because deep down inside you want to be free,
And the only way to do that is to be honest with yourself
remember that in the end, you can only change yourself.
When everything seems dark and hasty
look into my eyes and you will see
that everything you dreamed about is right in front of me
Don’t shut me out
Don’t hide behind your wall
Stop pretending you are someone you are not
I used to see you
but now you’re just a blur
an image of what I thought you were.
When you lie to them
it’s like lying to me
pretending to be happy
living in misery
Look around you
open your eyes
this little world you’re living in
is just a big old lie
You can’t live on this way
pretending to be what you’re not
pretending to all those that care
as if everything was okay
pretending that life is easy
is your biggest mistake
Wake up and see
see what you have become
See that everyone around you
is linked as one
When everything seems dark and hasty
open your eyes to see
that the real person inside, is staring back at me.
Sometimes in life we keep moving, as if the world outside our focus doesn’t exist. We don’t realize that what we may be doing or feeling in the moment can ruin the future. When we are young, we think everything is okay, we live in a world that says ‘it’s all about me’. You need to stop and wake up, you need to realize that it is not all about you, that there is a world out there you need to see, a world that isn’t so nice as the home you have lived in your entire life. Some know this better than others. The friends you think will always be there, most likely won’t. The guy you think loves you, will be just a memory of the past, and the family you keep pushing away is the only thing that will ever truly take you back.
We all make mistakes, we all have regrets and we all keep moving forward. It isn’t until you wake up from your dream like state that you can truly realize what it is you are doing with your life. Wake up and don’t smell the flowers but smell the disappointment, smell the raw facts of life, the ones that say you have no home, the one that says, you have no education, no job, no future. Do you smell it yet?
If you don’t, eventually you will. We all do, we all wake up from that dream like state, and we all see what has been in front of us the entire time. If you want to throw your life away, then it is your choice, but make it clear that this is what you want to do. Do not drag the rest of us down with you, do not lie to my face and make believe that everything is okay, when everything is all shades of fucked up. Don’t keep lying to me, or yourself, because the only person that ends up with a life they didn’t want is the person on the other side of the mirror. Take a good look, do you like what you see?
Type A or B Personality – image by: google.com/images Are you a Type A personality? What changes do you think you could make to become more of a Type B personality?
I took the Type A or B behavior pattern test and my results showed that I was somewhere in between a Type A which is aggressive and wanting to be great at everything versus Type B who has a more laid back kind of attitude.
My results said: You seem to be in the middle between the Type A and Type B personality. In this case, the middle ground is good. Your attitude to life is more of the “smell the roses” kind and you know how and when to relax. Nonetheless, you realize that picking up a challenge and competing a little bit for your place in the sun can add some spice to your life. The equilibrium is important, so don’t let your hostile, aggressive, and competitive alter ego take over too often. Generally, you are easy to be around, and people tend to feel relaxed and comfortable in your presence. Yours is a very healthy attitude towards life.
– I have to say this is pretty accurate. I like to make goals and I like to achieve the things I want in life, but I do not feel that I have to kill myself working all the time or that this is the most important thing in life. I do like to just stop and smell the roses, so to speak, I like to enjoy life and I know that life is too short to worry all the time. It’s too short to not enjoy the small things in life which makes us happy. In order to become more of a Type B personality I would just need to be a little more patient with certain things and a little more trusting. However I do not think that I would want to be a Type B personality, I think where I stand is perfect. There are times when we should be a little more aggressive in getting what we want and other times we need to know when it is the right time to relax and enjoy life.
Take the test for yourself and see which type of personality you are at Personality Tests
