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Tag: australia

  • I left my husband today…

    The Question:

    I feel weird… its been a long time coming. My husband wants to live in Australia and he does already. I want to stay in England with our son. I also don’t like the way he treats me so I called it quits. Anyway it went surprisingly well. He was fine with it, and said that he would come visit my son when he can. He was so nice to me and he’s never that nice. Its made me feel really guilty. I’m not going to change my mind on t love me to bits. I’m not going to change my mind on this although I love him to bits. I just don’t want to live in Australia and he wont live in England. Why was he so nice and how do I get past this upset weird guilty stage?

    Before anyone judges me it was the best thing to do for my son as my husband was violent at times…

    My Response:

    Dear England;

    I’m going to skip right to the part you said “your husband was violent at times”. If this was the case, then it’s more than just not wanting to move to Australia with your husband. If your husband was abusive then it is better to have gotten out of the marriage now rather than later. If you are choosing not to move just because you don’t want to leave home (England) sometimes we have to make sacrifices to keep our family together. Again if he was violent with you, then there is no reason for you to feel guilty for staying in England. You have to do what is right for you and your son, and it is better to leave an abusive relationship than to stay in one. You say that you still “love him to bits”, if your husband is abusing you it isn’t right, and you shouldn’t love anyone who can hurt you that way. What you are doing is better than being in an abusive relationship. If your husband is being nice, he may just be trying to get you to forgive him and move to Australia with him. Stick with what you believe, and if he is violent, I wouldn’t allow him to have visitation rights with your son alone, make sure you are always there with him.

    Good luck

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

  • Sacrificing dreams for a man, is it worth it?

    The Question:

    I met a guy 3 months before my big traveling trip. This was my dream. I told him my plans since day one and after spending a lot of time together we fell for each other and decided to keep in mutual contact. This progressed into a long distance. Our relationship got stronger and stronger its been year apart, I thought he was the one. I came to realize that I needed to make a choice between my relationship and my trip so I chose the relationship. But ever since we have booked the flight tickets of him visiting me in London then returning home to Australia together we have been constantly fighting for no reason. I thought it was because the long distance that once we can be physically together it would resolve the arguments. Today would be five days before he actually comes to London and he has dumped me.

    His reasons were that I haven’t sacrificed anything, if I loved him then I shouldn’t of left him in the first place and will not forgive me for it. That i haven’t given myself fully, I am holding back and don’t want to be committed. That the love that I give him is not good enough, not the same as the love he gives me.

    I am still in shock. I have planned this trip for ages it was my dream, he knew it all along and I have sacrificed it for the relationship. I have quit my job, quit all my traveling plans, worked my **** off to save some cash for when I get home. Flights were booked, parcels sent home all because I wanted the relationship. I am so confused, who would do something like that?

    My Response:

    Dear London;

    I’m going to make this short and sweet, Love is great but we will never understand why men do the things they do. You did the right thing by traveling and doing what you have always dreamed to do, sometimes we hold back for love only to find out later that the love we held back for wasn’t really ours to keep. I know it hurts and you already moved half your stuff, but you can get that back, stay where you are and don’t go back home, if your boyfriend wants to tell you about the sacrifices you haven’t made, how about the sacrifice he is throwing back in your face (the fact that he was waiting for you), and he could have joined you on your trip.He could be giving you the guilt trip to break up with you because he’s found someone else (it’s harsh to hear but you have to take this into consideration), or he just truly feels that the relationship isn’t going to work. Try talking to him to get closure if you like, but I think moving on and living your life is the best way to go. Keep doing what you are doing, you can’t stop your dreams for someone else, if the other person really and truly loves you, they will follow you to your dreams.

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com