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Tag: family

  • I’m too involved in my daughters life and it’s taking me away from my son and husband

    Over Involved Mother – image by: google.com/images

    The Question:

     Dear Kristin Nicole;

    I am way too involved in my nearly 15 year old daughter’s life. It consumes me and my happiness seems to be dependent on how happy she is. I find myself getting too involved in social issues and give advice often before she asks for it. We have a great relationship and she tells me so much but I sometimes wish she didn’t. Lately I have lost sleep worrying about girl issues and boyfriend issues. She is extremely attractive and athletic and often suffers from jealous girls trying to knock her down. Lately these girls have been trying to turn boys against her and have succeeded to a point. She says it doesn’t worry her but I struggle to believe that. She says she is fine but I just can’t stop worrying and giving advice. I need to stop before I ruin the wonderful relationship we have had and she stops telling me things. It’s just that I know what can potentially happen and I am trying to protect her from it. Help me to stop as i am neglecting my 11 year old son and husband that is all that is consuming my thoughts. I am an educated person with a degree so I should know better! (Edited by: KN)

    My Response:

    Dear Over involved mom;

    I know it’s hard to not worry about your daughter, but you have already passed the first step of realizing you are too involved. You have to accept that your daughter needs to make her own mistakes and you need to try to let what she tells you not bother you. If your daughter is open with you and she is telling you that she is okay, you need to believe her and let her come to you if things aren’t okay. Start making time for mother and son day. I can only imagine that things in common with an 11 year old son may be difficult but try to see what he wants to do and start giving him attention as well. Also try to make time for a date night with your husband and talk to him about how you are feeling. If you don’t explain to him how you feel then he won’t understand what it is you are going through. If you talk to him then at least he will have a better understanding on what is going on with you. Remember communication is key, let him help you and get your mind off things. Remember teenagers will have ups and downs, that’s why it’s called teenage years, so try not to worry so much about your daughter. It sounds to me like she’s a smart girl, and she already knows she can come to you if she needs you. Start focusing on the good and don’t over analyze everything she tells you.
    Good Luck
    xo,
    kristin nicole

  • RIP Luis Ceballos – An Angel was taken

    RIP Luis

    In life we don’t know how we will die, or when we will die, but for others we are prepared and given no choice but to be taken from our family. Cancer is something not many people plan for, it isn’t something we can every truly understand, and no matter how hard we fight, sometimes Cancer defeats us, and with that God has taken a man that has touched so many. I only met Luis about two times, and in those two times you can tell he was an incredible man. This man meant so much to so many people. He walked into the life of my friends mom, she finally found the love her life and it saddens me to know she has lost him to the battle of cancer.

    A man who touched so many lives was lost yesterday, he has left behind a wife, and children and step children, grandchildren, family and friends. Luis had a journal in which he wrote how he felt, his last entry was on Father’s Day of 2012. You can see his journal entries here: http://lceballos61.livejournal.com/. If you truly want to meet a strong man, I recommend you read his journal. He is an inspiration to us all.

    Whenever you feel like your life isn’t going the way you expected, stop and be grateful for what you do have in your life. Luis taught us to stop and smell the flowers no matter how hard life hits you. He taught many never to give up and to live life to the fullest. I only hope that his family can take on his strength and that they will one day feel peace in their hearts. Today we mourn a man who was strong, a man who thought more about his own family than any other man I have ever met, and today I give thanks for knowing him, even if it was only for a short time. I give thanks to god for letting his wife and my friends have them in their lives and to love such a wonderful man. I am sorry they had to lose him to cancer and I will pray that they will get through this hard time.

    I love you all and my prayers are with you. Today God took not only an incredible man, but an angel. Rest In Peace Luis, we will all miss you.

    xo,

    kristin nicole

  • I know…

    I know… image by: google.com/images

    I know

    I know what it feels like
    I know what it takes
    I know deep inside you feel lost
    A wall you have built
    To let everyone out
    Hoping that will make things better
    Losing yourself within the doubt

    When things start looking better
    You sabotage your own results
    Living a lie not in pleasure
    You cry in bed at all costs

    I know how you feel
    I was there too
    Not knowing who you are
    Pretending to be two

    Living in the dark
    Not knowing where to go
    Living a lie of happiness
    When all you feel is alone

    You don’t have to cry
    You don’t have to feel alone
    You don’t need to defy all the odds
    You have to just let go

    Let go of the sadness, of the anger and tears
    Look deep inside yourself
    And get rid of all your fears

    Deep down there is a way
    Even though you may not see
    But everyone at one point feels alone
    You just have to wake up and see
    That although you do not want to hear it, see it or believe it
    Family is always there
    Because we care.

    Take a moment to see who you are
    Know that in the end you will go far
    You have to have faith and see what we see
    Because deep down inside you want to be free,
    And the only way to do that is to be honest with yourself
    remember that in the end, you can only change yourself.

    xo
    kristin nicole

    © Written by: Kristin Nicole – August 2012

  • Wonder

    Wonder – Images by: google.com/images

    Wonder

    Why do you shut out those that you love?
    Why do you lay there pretending you are the only one?
    Why can’t you see you’re going to be all alone?
    You’ve pushed us away for so long
    We are practically out the door.

    She loved you but you couldn’t see
    All the things she meant to be
    With every day the heart grows fonder
    In this case, the days grew quieter

    With every rain drop tears fell at night
    Holding in the anger that made everything alright
    Now it’s in the open a relationship that barely exists
    Separate lives, one house, not a home
    But a reminder of what isn’t there anymore.

    We hope and we pray that everything will be alright
    Scared to move forward
    Staying in something that isn’t right
    Pretending everything is okay
    Is killing the way I feel
    Wondering if love is even real.

    Does it always go away?
    Or does true love really exist?
    Two people, one world, one love
    In the end does it all even matter?
    Or do we keep moving forward
    Pretending that life is going to be okay
    Scared to move on
    Scared of the world
    Scared to be alone
    Living in a lie that will never be home.

    © Written by: kristin nicole 2012

  • Little Black Box

    Little black box

    When you left I put you in a box
    wrapped you up and left you in the back of my head
    Every now and then you pop up in my mind
    leave me alone
    it just isn’t our time

    You left me so sudden
    it all just went away
    I didn’t have time to cry for you
    so I walked away.

    Everyone leaves one day
    but it just wasn’t your time
    that day in the hospital
    a part of me died.
    Every time someone left a part of me left too
    it’s a wonder I’m still here
    standing here
    writing this to you.

    With tears held back
    I shiver in fear
    because I don’t know who I’ll lose next
    and drown out my tears

    The world is so big
    yet oh so small
    why can’t you just leave when you leave
    why do you linger in my dreams?

    Letting go of pain
    is the hardest thing I’ve had to do
    Living in this world of mine
    I do what I have to do

    Today is another day
    Today I continue to walk
    Today I live my life
    with you in that little black box.

    © ~written by: kristin nicole – March 16, 2011

    xo,
    kristin nicole

  • Did you ever think of me?!?

    Did You Ever Think Of ME?

    Did you ever stop and think of me
    Or did you just pretend I never existed?
    Closed that door
    made a lie about how you never loved me anymore
    Left me standing there with my heart on my sleeve
    wondering what I did wrong
    Wondering how I can fix something that didn’t exist.

    I wrote you a letter
    you never wrote back
    later i found out you held it in your sack.
    Why didn’t you say anything to me
    why did you hide who you were
    don’t you know i would have loved you anyway

    Standing there all alone
    I cried
    Wondering why you couldn’t love me
    And with tears in my eyes I pulled out that paper and pen
    started to write all the things you didn’t want to feel
    But I told you the truth
    and the truth always hurts
    look in the mirror and see who you are
    stop hiding
    I’m right here.

    No words can express the pain you caused me
    I think that’s when I started shutting people out
    I started to hide behind a wall
    because behind the wall no one can see
    all the pain you truly caused me.

    I pulled out that paper and pen
    started to write all the things you didn’t want to hear
    But I told you the truth
    and the truth always hurts
    look in the mirror and see who you are
    stop hiding
    I’m right here.

    Now it’s too late
    you’re already gone
    Why couldn’t you see the truth
    that no matter who you were
    I would always love you.
    Why couldn’t you stop hiding?
    I was right here…

    © written by: kristin nicole – February 19, 2010 – Friday

    ~ This was written about someone that used to be in my life. They passed away without ever being able to talk things out. Life is too short, when you feel something let the person you love know because you never know when they’ll be gone. If I haven’t said it enough, I love you!~

    xo,
    kristin nicole

  • Inspiration

    This week…

    So this week I didn’t have many Advice columns, I was inspired to write from the heart, write about life and questions that we sometimes have. I have come across a few people in my life, friends that have come and gone, boyfriends, and family and I know so many people who have the same questions. Sometimes we think we are alone in what we feel, we feel like no one can ever understand us. In some cases no one will know 100% of what you feel because everyone goes through life differently and everyone reacts differently to situations, but just because you go through it differently doesn’t mean another person can’t understand what you are going through.

    Life is a road we all must take, and although we don’t know where it is going, we drive on it anyway, hoping it leads us to that happy ending in the sky….

    Inspiration:

    In life I have met people who have inspired me to become a better person, inspired me to fight for what I want and inspired me that no matter what you may think about yourself or what others may think of you, in the end you will find your way….
    Life has brought a lot of negative things but it’s also brought a lot of positive, loving things. If we dwell on the negative that has happened to us then we will never be able to truly move forward, we will never be able to truly feel the happiness that is out there waiting for us. I can’t say I haven’t held grudges or that I’m perfect, and I am not saying it’s easy to forgive someone that has hurt you, but if we can’t change the past, we can’t change what happened to us then we need to learn how to move on from it. We need to learn that the past stays in the past and our future has so many more possibilities filled with love and happiness. I have to believe that there is more out there for me, just like I know there is more out there for you (the person reading this). Each day I get closer to my dreams coming true.

    Today I am inspired to become a better person
    Today I am inspired to make my dreams come true
    Today I am inspired to believe in the unbelievable
    Today I am inspired to Love
    Today I am inspired to take in the cool air and imagine the possibilities
    Today I am just inspired…..

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    © kristin nicole

  • Happy Birthday Mom

    Have you ever had a best friend in your life? A friend that isn’t just your friend but your mom? That’s how I feel about my mom…. If I have a problem with anything I know I can always count on her, I can only hope to be a great mother one day, the way she has been to me and my brother and sister.

    I want to dedicate this poem to my mom… Happy Birthday Mom, I hope you are having a wonderful day; today and many more years to come.

    Today Is your Day…

    Today is the day I thank God
    Not only for making you my mother
    But for making you my Best Friend.

    Today is the day I thank God
    For having you in my life.
    When I needed you the most you were always there for me.
    When I thought my heart was breaking you cried with me.
    When I thought I wasn’t good enough, you encouraged me.
    When I thought life was too hard, you showed me the way.
    Without you in my life I would be lost
    You showed me to be me, you love me for me and you accept every part of me.

    You are not only my best friend, but my mother
    And I am the luckiest daughter in the world to have a mother like you in my life.

    Today I thank God
    Because without you I would be lost.
    Happy Birthday Mom! I love you!

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    “A mother is the truest friend we have, when trials heavy and sudden, fall upon us; when adversity takes the place of prosperity; when friends who rejoice with us in our sunshine desert us; when trouble thickens around us, still will she cling to us, and endeavor by her kind precepts and counsels to dissipate the clouds of darkness, and cause peace to return to our hearts.” –Washington Irving

  • My friend had sex with her brother…

    The Question:

    Parents what would you do if your son, and daughter had sex? Just wondering?
    I know a friend of mine who had sex with her brother she told me, and I want to know if I were to tell, what parents would do in general in that kind of situation?

    My response:

    Dear Teen with a big secret;

    I am not a parent but I am an older sister to my 16 year old sister. It is a scary thought that your kids may be having sex and to find out that they are I couldn’t imagine. BUT…. Yes…But…..it is going to happen one day. I don’t agree with having sex at such a young age and I do think that you really need to think about it before doing it. Most boys just want to have sex and nothing more, and the minute the girl gives it up the boy is gone. I know this happened to a lot of my friends in high school. If you are a parent that just found out your son or daughter is having sex or had sex, the only thing you can do is try to NOT to overreact. Try to talk to them about all the consequences, like diseases and about teen pregnancy. If you have a boy buy him condemns and explain to him about all the things that can happen along with respecting girls. If you have a girl, I think it is a lot harder, you can either get her on birth-control (Most parents think this is just giving the OKAY to have sex) but it’s better than the alternative…(Pregnancy), and you need to talk to her and explain all the the bad stuff that can come with having sex at such a young age. In the situation that your friend had sex with her own brother, that is just plain WRONG! That is incest and it can be that the brother raped her or molested her. If she had sex with her own brother willingly, that is wrong on all levels and either way they need help. In that situation I am not sure what the parents would do, they need to talk to both of them and find out exactly what happened and why. They will then need to have a lot of counseling. This is not normal and I hope your friend knows this. I hope she can get the help she needs and I hope her parents are strong enough to deal with something like this. Good luck….

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

  • Tomorrow’s not Promised

    There comes a time in life when you have to realize this is it… when everything around you changes and you feel like you have changed as well. This is called “growing up”.

    In a life full of questions, in a life full of fun, there isn’t a moment that passes that I wonder is this the one?

    Is this the one time that I’ll make this mistake
    Is this the one time I’ll cry
    Is this the one time I’ll laugh
    Or is this all a lesson of which I’ve passed?

    Time is an essence
    a tick of the clock
    when you look around you
    nothing has stopped.

    Every     day passes
    another day gone
    another day older
    another day closer.

    Live your life to the fullest
    and have no regrets
    because tomorrow’s not promised
    but today…
    today I live
    today I grow
    today i tell you i love you
    Tomorrow, I just don’t know…

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    © written by: kristin nicole 2009