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Tag: fiance

  • My fiance cheated on me with my best friend…

    The Question:

    Fiance Cheated on me and now we are through. What do I do now?
    We had been together 6 years and then she cheats on me with my friend and is with him now. I feel lost, don’t quite know what to do. I loved her very much and just in shock still of what has happened, was the last possible thing i ever thought could have happened. How do i make it through the days without her, what do i do now? How do I attempt to find someone after so long with her i don’t even know where to begin. Any advice is deeply appreciated.

    My Response:

    Dear Recovering;

    It’s hard, not only did your girlfriend who you thought you were getting married to cheat on you but she cheated on you with your best friend. The first thing you need to realize is your best friend, really was never a friend if he was able to cheat with his best friend’s fiance. Second your girlfriend is not worth being sad over if she just couldn’t tell you how she felt and ended things before going onto your best friend. You got hit here with a double wammy, not only did you lose your girlfriend but you lost your best friend the same day. You deserve better, you need to stop feeling sorry for yourself and realize that it was better to have lost her before you got married, I know it doesn’t make you feel better and the pain of loosing her isn’t just going to go away, but you need to stand up and be strong. Start hanging out with other friends and get back out there. I wouldn’t recommend getting back into a relationship so bad because you are still hurting, but go out there and start dating, have some fun and in time you will see that things happen for a reason. You may not see that reason now, but I promise that one day you will turn around and remember these words and you will truly see that everything happens for a reason.

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

  • Should I tell my fiance this before we get married?

    The Question:

    My policy for abuse is that if he tries to or does hit, push, etc then I’m absolutely done, no second chances, I’m getting the marriage annulled the next day. I have just been through too many shitty, abusive relationships and I don’t want him to be ‘just another asshole with a temper’ (as my mom says it, haha) He hasn’t ever hit me on purpose before. During our worst fight ever we were talking really loudly at each other and he came towards me really quickly with his arms open. I freaked out and blocked with my arms. He was just trying to give me a hug but I’m just SO cautious about that kind of stuff. Should I sit him down and like have a serious conversation about it or just say something when something on the news about spousal abuse comes on?

    My Response:

    Dear No Abuse;

    It doesn’t look to me as if your boyfriend is abusive, you said he has never hit you on purpose before though? Does that mean he has hit you before? Then you said the worst fight you had he was going in for a hug but you got defensive. You definitely have some things you need to get over, I know it’s hard not to take your past into new relationships, but if your fiance is a good guy, and has never hit you then you need to trust that he won’t. I would definitely open up to him about your past and how you feel on the situation/subject. It is important for him to know what you have gone through and why you are sometimes defensive. I am happy that you have gotten out of abusive relationships and have realized that those type of relationships are no good for you. You seem like a strong women, I would definitely talk to your fiance about what you have gone through in the past, explain to him that you just want to make sure your relationship is in a good place that nothing like that would ever happen. Don’t make him feel like he may do that one day, he might get defensive, especially if he has never shown any type of abuse towards you, if he has shown abuse, then you should definitely sit down and talk to him, and you might have a few things to think about before getting married. Never take abuse from anyone, the person you are with needs to love and respect you. There is nothing wrong with telling your fiance what you have gone through, and this may make your relationship stronger, it is always good to share with your partner the struggles you have had to overcome in life. Good luck.

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com