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Tag: kristin nicole

  • Random Thoughts 08/09/12

    … image by: google.com/images

    I haven’t written anything in a while, I have been trying to come up with things to say, but lately I have felt overwhelmed and tired. Sometimes when you are so frustrated the words just don’t come out. I’m not sure if I’m angry with the situations that have come or if I’m just tired of them. Sometimes it would be easier to just pick up and walk away, but sometimes that isn’t always the answer.

    On top of the drama, I have had good things happen within the last few weeks. I finally got my Bachelor’s in Psychology (whoot whoot). And now I am taking a small break before starting my Masters Program. The masters program is an accelerated course, so I will get my Masters in a year. It will be very stressful and a lot of work, but I’m hoping it will be worth it in the end. Living in Miami it’s hard to find your way into writing/editing. Many freelance jobs do not offer that much pay. Unfortunately I have to work full time, and with that comes bills that need to be paid, I can’t just pick up and leave to work for an intern position to get that experience on my board. I have to work with what I got. I was grateful enough to know a beautiful friend of mine who helped me get an internship, working from home, so I was able to get extra experience on my board right there. I feel though, that it just isn’t enough. You would think Miami being one of the biggest cities there would be more opportunity out here, but unfortunately I see it more in New York or California, I’m not one to turn any of those options down, I love both states, however; it’s hard. My family is here in Miami and my boyfriend and I have a beautiful home we have been fixing up, it wouldn’t be easy to let that go (and I would need for my boyfriend to come with me), but these are all options that have not come up at the moment, so options that need no worry for the time being.

    I like to think ahead though, and thinking ahead sometimes causes me to stress. I need a vacation. I’m looking forward to my second visit to Chicago this month. I plan on taking lots of pictures and sharing a few on here. I want to start taking more pictures, it’s relaxing and I enjoy it.

    Well I know I’ve been rambling, so good night for now.

    xo
    kristin nicole

  • I know…

    I know… image by: google.com/images

    I know

    I know what it feels like
    I know what it takes
    I know deep inside you feel lost
    A wall you have built
    To let everyone out
    Hoping that will make things better
    Losing yourself within the doubt

    When things start looking better
    You sabotage your own results
    Living a lie not in pleasure
    You cry in bed at all costs

    I know how you feel
    I was there too
    Not knowing who you are
    Pretending to be two

    Living in the dark
    Not knowing where to go
    Living a lie of happiness
    When all you feel is alone

    You don’t have to cry
    You don’t have to feel alone
    You don’t need to defy all the odds
    You have to just let go

    Let go of the sadness, of the anger and tears
    Look deep inside yourself
    And get rid of all your fears

    Deep down there is a way
    Even though you may not see
    But everyone at one point feels alone
    You just have to wake up and see
    That although you do not want to hear it, see it or believe it
    Family is always there
    Because we care.

    Take a moment to see who you are
    Know that in the end you will go far
    You have to have faith and see what we see
    Because deep down inside you want to be free,
    And the only way to do that is to be honest with yourself
    remember that in the end, you can only change yourself.

    xo
    kristin nicole

    © Written by: Kristin Nicole – August 2012

  • In the dark

    Alone… image by: google.com/images


    In the dark

    When everything seems dark and hasty
    look into my eyes and you will see
    that everything you dreamed about is right in front of me

    Don’t shut me out
    Don’t hide behind your wall
    Stop pretending you are someone you are not

    I used to see you
    but now you’re just a blur
    an image of what I thought you were.

    When you lie to them
    it’s like lying to me
    pretending to be happy
    living in misery

    Look around you
    open your eyes
    this little world you’re living in
    is just a big old lie

    You can’t live on this way
    pretending to be what you’re not
    pretending to all those that care
    as if everything was okay
    pretending that life is easy
    is your biggest mistake

    Wake up and see
    see what you have become
    See that everyone around you
    is linked as one

    When everything seems dark and hasty
    open your eyes to see
    that the real person inside, is staring back at me.

    xo
    kristin nicole

    © written by: kristin nicole July 2012

  • Do you like what you see?

    image by: google.com/images

    Sometimes in life we keep moving, as if the world outside our focus doesn’t exist. We don’t realize that what we may be doing or feeling in the moment can ruin the future. When we are young, we think everything is okay, we live in a world that says ‘it’s all about me’. You need to stop and wake up, you need to realize that it is not all about you, that there is a world out there you need to see, a world that isn’t so nice as the home you have lived in your entire life. Some know this better than others. The friends you think will always be there, most likely won’t. The guy you think loves you, will be just a memory of the past, and the family you keep pushing away is the only thing that will ever truly take you back.

    We all make mistakes, we all have regrets and we all keep moving forward. It isn’t until you wake up from your dream like state that you can truly realize what it is you are doing with your life. Wake up and don’t smell the flowers but smell the disappointment, smell the raw facts of life, the ones that say you have no home, the one that says, you have no education, no job, no future. Do you smell it yet?

    If you don’t, eventually you will. We all do, we all wake up from that dream like state, and we all see what has been in front of us the entire time. If you want to throw your life away, then it is your choice, but make it clear that this is what you want to do. Do not drag the rest of us down with you, do not lie to my face and make believe that everything is okay, when everything is all shades of fucked up. Don’t keep lying to me, or yourself, because the only person that ends up with a life they didn’t want is the person on the other side of the mirror. Take a good look, do you like what you see?

    xo
    kristin nicole

  • Type A or B Personality

    Type A or B Personality – image by: google.com/images

    Are you a Type A personality? What changes do you think you could make to become more of a Type B personality?

    I took the Type A or B behavior pattern test and my results showed that I was somewhere in between a Type A which is aggressive and wanting to be great at everything versus Type B who has a more laid back kind of attitude.

    My results said: You seem to be in the middle between the Type A and Type B personality. In this case, the middle ground is good. Your attitude to life is more of the “smell the roses” kind and you know how and when to relax. Nonetheless, you realize that picking up a challenge and competing a little bit for your place in the sun can add some spice to your life. The equilibrium is important, so don’t let your hostile, aggressive, and competitive alter ego take over too often. Generally, you are easy to be around, and people tend to feel relaxed and comfortable in your presence. Yours is a very healthy attitude towards life.

    – I have to say this is pretty accurate. I like to make goals and I like to achieve the things I want in life, but I do not feel that I have to kill myself working all the time or that this is the most important thing in life. I do like to just stop and smell the roses, so to speak, I like to enjoy life and I know that life is too short to worry all the time. It’s too short to not enjoy the small things in life which makes us happy. In order to become more of a Type B personality I would just need to be a little more patient with certain things and a little more trusting. However I do not think that I would want to be a Type B personality, I think where I stand is perfect. There are times when we should be a little more aggressive in getting what we want and other times we need to know when it is the right time to relax and enjoy life.

    Take the test for yourself and see which type of personality you are at Personality Tests

    xo,
    kristin nicole

  • Wonder

    Wonder – Images by: google.com/images

    Wonder

    Why do you shut out those that you love?
    Why do you lay there pretending you are the only one?
    Why can’t you see you’re going to be all alone?
    You’ve pushed us away for so long
    We are practically out the door.

    She loved you but you couldn’t see
    All the things she meant to be
    With every day the heart grows fonder
    In this case, the days grew quieter

    With every rain drop tears fell at night
    Holding in the anger that made everything alright
    Now it’s in the open a relationship that barely exists
    Separate lives, one house, not a home
    But a reminder of what isn’t there anymore.

    We hope and we pray that everything will be alright
    Scared to move forward
    Staying in something that isn’t right
    Pretending everything is okay
    Is killing the way I feel
    Wondering if love is even real.

    Does it always go away?
    Or does true love really exist?
    Two people, one world, one love
    In the end does it all even matter?
    Or do we keep moving forward
    Pretending that life is going to be okay
    Scared to move on
    Scared of the world
    Scared to be alone
    Living in a lie that will never be home.

    © Written by: kristin nicole 2012

  • He is a virgin but I’m not…

    The Question:

    Dear Kristin Nicole;

    My boyfriend that I am with now is a virgin, I didn’t know this when we first started dating, because he seems so confident, I had assumed he wasn’t a virgin. He is 23 years old and I am 21, I have had more than one partner in my life and I am wondering if I am going to enjoy having sex with my boyfriend. I want someone who is going to know what to do, not someone I have to tell what to do. Is it wrong of me to think this way? Should I break up with him, or should I take his virginity?

    ~ Boyfriends a Virgin

    My Response:

    Dear Boyfriends a Virgin;

    You shouldn’t break up with your boyfriend just because he is a virgin, you obviously liked him enough to become his girlfriend. It may not be the same as the other men you have been with, but he might just surprise you. Try taking the dominant role and perhaps showing him exactly what you like will win over the rest in the end. Sometimes you can’t teach an old dog new tricks, but one that doesn’t know any better might be worth a little work. Have you tried doing other stuff with him? Perhaps having a little fun beforehand can loosen up the mood. If you really feel like you do not want to be with him, make sure before taking his virginity, although I’m sure he wouldn’t mind. Good luck

    xo,
    kristin nicole

  • I won’t Give Up – Jason Mraz

    I won't give up – image by: google.com/images

    I think this song is beautiful and Jason Mraz is a great singer and performer. Hope you like it….

    I won’t give up

    When I look into your eyes
    It’s like watching the night sky
    Or a beautiful sunrise
    There’s so much they hold
    And just like them old stars
    I see that you’ve come so far
    To be right where you are
    How old is your soul?

    I won’t give up on us
    Even if the skies get rough
    I’m giving you all my love
    I’m still looking up

    And when you’re needing your space
    To do some navigating
    I’ll be here patiently waiting
    To see what you find

    ‘Cause even the stars they burn
    Some even fall to the earth
    We’ve got a lot to learn
    God knows we’re worth it
    No, I won’t give up

    I don’t wanna be someone who walks away so easily
    I’m here to stay and make the difference that I can make
    Our differences they do a lot to teach us how to use
    The tools and gifts we got yeah, we got a lot at stake
    And in the end, you’re still my friend at least we did intend
    For us to work we didn’t break, we didn’t burn
    We had to learn how to bend without the world caving in
    I had to learn what I’ve got, and what I’m not
    And who I am

    I won’t give up on us
    Even if the skies get rough
    I’m giving you all my love
    I’m still looking up
    Still looking up.

    I won’t give up on us (no I’m not giving up)
    God knows I’m tough enough (I am tough, I am loved)
    We’ve got a lot to learn (we’re alive, we are loved)
    God knows we’re worth it (and we’re worth it)

    I won’t give up on us
    Even if the skies get rough
    I’m giving you all my love
    I’m still looking up

    You can see the video HERE

  • When I see you

    when i see you – image by: google.com/images

    When I see you

    When I see you
    I think of her
    Wondering if she’s happy
    Wondering what went wrong
    Why couldn’t I see she was the one?

    I tried to move on
    Pretend that I was happy
    But deep down I’ll never forget
    That in the hearts of all hearts I let the best of me go
    And when I think of her
    She’s all I’ll ever know.

    I moved forward with my life
    I have someone new
    And although a part of me loves her
    It will never be you.

    You were the one that knew me best
    The good with the bad
    But I was so stupid to think you would never leave
    I was stupid to think I had you
    That you would never run away
    But when I broke your heart
    You had no words to say

    I begged you to listen
    I begged you to speak
    But when I looked at you
    You were no longer weak.

    You were filled with anger
    But you didn’t shed a single tear
    Instead I was the one drowning out all my fears
    We sat there in silence and you looked in a daze
    When I tried to reach you
    You were nowhere in sight
    When I left that day
    It broke me in half
    Because I knew that it was over
    And you were never coming back.

    ©kristin nicole – 2012

  • Will you love me?

    Will you love me – Photo by: kristin nicole

    Will you love me forever and ever and ever?
    Or is forever way too long?
    Will you kiss my lips so tender
    or will it be strong?

    Will you show me your heart
    or let it fall apart?
    Will you hug me and hold me
    or let me go and unfold me?

    Will you shower me with love
    or will my tears fall down?
    Will you tell me how you feel
    or hide away all your fears?

    Will you show me the light
    or cower in the dark?
    Will you make love to me
    or fuck me?

    Will you catch me when I fall
    or will you let me drop?
    Will you love me forever and ever
    or will you say never?

    © Written by: kristin nicole ~ May 2012