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Tag: lost

  • Advice Column: New Chick or Old Chick?

    Advice Column: New Chick or Old Chick?

    Dear kristin nicole;

    Ok I need some help. I just started dating this new chick a month ago, we were acquaintances before we started dating. I liked her so much (mostly because she is hot) that I cut it off the previous girl I was dating (equally hot) because that one was going downhill fast. And I wanted to start new and fresh without anyone in the way. This new chick was in the same situation as me as she stopped talking to the one person she was dating as they were going downhill as well. So we were basically in the same situation when we started seeing each other. Everything was great for this whole month until I found out yesterday that she is still hanging out with her ex. When I confronted her she admitted it but stated they are just friends. To top it off they are neighbors so it’s not like they can’t see each other. I’m very upset at this situation because I stopped talking to the one I was dating previous to this new chick and then she does this to me. Also the previous chick is begging me back and pleading to see me. I decline her advances to me but I still talk to her here and there. What should I do? Should I go back to the previous chick (which has its own set of problems) or should I just stay with the new chick knowing that she still sees her ex?

    Thanks,
    Confused dude

    Dear Confused dude;

    I think that if she is still talking to her ex and didn’t tell you can mean two things, one that she still has feelings for him so she hid the the fact that he lives next door and that she still talks to him or two she figured you might get a little jealous and since there is nothing going on figured telling you would only make things questionable, which in fact it has. I think she should have been honest with you and if there is nothing going on with the ex then there is no reason for her to hide anything from you. If you really like this new girl then you need to talk to her, ask her what is up? Ask her straight out about her ex, if she still has feelings for him then you don’t want to be involved with a girl who can’t make up her mind, if she says nothing is going on with her ex and she really likes you, then you have one of two choices, believe her (because she has never shown you otherwise that she may be lying) or decide that you can’t deal with it and move on. As for the first girl – Stop keeping her around, tell her you are just not interested in her like that (of course say this in a nice way), but don’t even bother with someone that you already know is complicated. Why would you want that in your life? Don’t ever settle just because it is easy, if you really like someone and they like you it should happen easily.

    xo,
    kristin nicole

  • You’re NOT the one (Her thoughts)

    This is an old poem (Repost). Enjoy

    PART 2 – You’re NOT the One (Her thoughts)……

    You thought you stopped loving me?
    You thought you didn’t care?
    How could you be so selfish to just sit back and stare?
    I looked into your eyes as my eyes filled up with tears,
    You stood there standing watching me drown out my fears.

    You pretended to be happy.
    You put on an act,
    You thought I couldn’t see the truth,
    You had to face the facts.

    You put up a wall; you pushed me to the floor
    I did all I could do
    I even gave you my door.
    Then one day I woke up and realized this is it.
    I didn’t want to be with you, my fate was sealed with out your kiss.

    CHORUS:
    Now you’re the one crying inside
    You’re the one that can’t let go
    You’re the one wishing for me to come back
    Wishing once again I’d be at your door.

    You pushed me way to far.
    I walked right out the door.
    I told you I loved you but I couldn’t take the pain no more.
    I asked you if you loved me.
    I gave you one last chance.
    All you did was look at me, you failed my last request.

    With silence in your eyes, you stood in disbelief.
    You didn’t say a single word, you didn’t share a peep.
    If you would have listened closely,
    You can hear my every word,
    You can hear the tears fall down
    And my heart break in a million burns.

    You didn’t think I’d leave you,
    You thought I’d always be around
    You thought you had me.
    You stood your ground.

    Well you thought wrong…
    You let me walk away
    You lost me that day.
    Now you’re left with nothing to say.

    CHORUS x 2

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    © written by: kristin nicole

  • Little Black Box

    Little black box

    When you left I put you in a box
    wrapped you up and left you in the back of my head
    Every now and then you pop up in my mind
    leave me alone
    it just isn’t our time

    You left me so sudden
    it all just went away
    I didn’t have time to cry for you
    so I walked away.

    Everyone leaves one day
    but it just wasn’t your time
    that day in the hospital
    a part of me died.
    Every time someone left a part of me left too
    it’s a wonder I’m still here
    standing here
    writing this to you.

    With tears held back
    I shiver in fear
    because I don’t know who I’ll lose next
    and drown out my tears

    The world is so big
    yet oh so small
    why can’t you just leave when you leave
    why do you linger in my dreams?

    Letting go of pain
    is the hardest thing I’ve had to do
    Living in this world of mine
    I do what I have to do

    Today is another day
    Today I continue to walk
    Today I live my life
    with you in that little black box.

    © ~written by: kristin nicole – March 16, 2011

    xo,
    kristin nicole

  • I’m pregnant and my husband doesn’t come home…

    The Question:

    Dear kristin nicole;

    I have read some on the stories and comments you gave to other women, and I’m in the same kind of boat and I don’t know what to believe or do. So here is my story please help.

    Me and my husband have been married for 9 months, still newlyweds but have lots of problems. We or I should say I did rush into due to a baby on the way and I loved him and he loved me. So we got married. It was great we were happy. He has a kid from a previous relationship and I do to, but he was great with my daughter, I mean great. That’s her daddy, and especially since her father is out of the picture. We lost the baby I was pregnant with 2 weeks after the wedding. We were both sad. We both want a baby and have been trying since then, but we argue all the time. He says he has no say so in anything the house, my daughter nothing. I just disagree on something and he doesn’t understand. The arguing has got bad over little things. So much that his son doesn’t want to come here anymore. We are both tired of it, he’s even said he wanted a divorce. So to my big problem I found out in November we where pregnant I was so excited because we had been trying and praying, but he didn’t seem too happy. We started arguing about baby names he started saying he had no say in this either, that I’m always downing him and acting different with his son, which is not true. I speak my opinion and I disagree. I do agree I am different with his son and my daughter and I’m sorry for that. For the last past two weeks its been hell fighting all the time. He was getting laid off from his job and I tried talking to him, it wasn’t good enough. He said I act as if I could care less, but I tried talk to him so two weeks ago after a fight about me not caring he left for work and hasn’t come back. His story is he has a new job and there working out of town, he will be home this day. When they day comes its something else his car broke he cant make it. I’ve accused him of cheating being with someone else and he said he’s not with anyone else that he is just working and that he is tired of me accusing him all the time. When I try to talk to him about what I feel and I love him, he avoids my questions or when I ask when are you coming home he gives me a day and it never happens. He wasn’t even here for Christmas and that made me really mad and I went off on him and told him to just come get his stuff I wanted a divorce because I cant take his lying and him not begin here especially with me three months pregnant with his baby, it hurt bad and I don’t know what to. I love him and I want us to be a family, my daughter loves him and miss I him. I don’t believe he’s working out of town. He said he was working today but he always has his son and he told me he was taking him to work with him. That’s BS because you don’t take a 5 year old to your so called new job especially when you say you are building apts. He came home Thursday wanting sex and got some more clothes said he would be back Saturday and like always he came up with an excuse. I do not know what to do. I need help… why would he just walk away after knocking me up and after me telling him we can work on this, that we have a baby on the way and that I don’t want to go down this road. He accuses me of sleeping with people but I love him to much to do that. Bills are behind because of his actions and I just need some advice. Please I don’t want to lose him.

    ~Desperate

    My Response:

    Dear Desperate;

    Sometimes men get scared, and having a child together is a big deal. He may be feeling confused since you have been arguing lately. Try sitting down with him and talking to him. Explain to him how you feel, that you love him and you don’t want to be arguing all the time. You want to make sure he is happy in your marriage. You can try telling him how you feel but if he’s not willing to try, there is nothing you can do. The fact that you are suspicious of him cheating on you and that he doesn’t show up sometimes is not a good sign. You need to try and think of you and your baby at this point, is this type of relationship you want to show your child? Is the type of man you truly want for yourself? I know it’s not easy and you are definitely in a hard position but you have to think about your unborn child now. The most important thing to do is to take care of yourself. If you have family you can stay with, try getting your bills paid and try making a life for you and your child. It sounds to me like you can do better then this guy…. If he was a real man he would stand up and try to make things work with you. If he truly loves you he will at least TRY to make it work.

    I hope I could help. I hope your New Year gets better in time.

    xo,
    kristin nicole

  • Get Your Own Friend

    Get your own Friends

    Get your own friends
    why do you have to seek out mine?
    are you not over it?
    give up your pride…

    Tell me a story
    the one that fell apart
    the one that left you
    and died out your heart

    Get your own friends
    leave mine alone
    is it not enough that it ended,
    that you keep lurking around my door?

    Time is of essence
    we all have to move on
    leave it alone now
    leave it be
    leave, leave, leave…

    Get out of my mind
    out my head
    leaving was the best thing
    if not I’d be dead

    Get your own friends
    just leave mine alone
    find a new hobby
    find a new friend
    just stop trying to steal mine instead…

    © ~written by: kristin nicole – March 2011

    This was inspired by a dream a friend told me about. She stopped being friends with her child hood friend and she started hanging out with her friends and taking them from her, she just wanted to move on from their friendship, but every time she turned around, she was there. Hope you enjoyed the poem.

    xo,
    kristin nicole

  • Is there hope after love?


    The Question:

    “I don’t love you any more” I will never forget the day my wife told me those words…we have only been married for less than a year and been together for two years before that but it still felt like my my whole life was falling apart…people tell me I’m lucky we had no kids or that it happened now instead of 20 years down the road but that doesn’t seem to take away from the fact that I love her more than any thing…to be told your not loved by the person you built your world around will knock you down and I’m finding it very hard to get back up. I’ve moved away and I’m starting a new job but my hart seems to be stuck in the past, I still love her even thought I know there is no real hope of us ever being together again. I’ve started drinking which I never do but it seems to be the only thing that takes away some of the pain if only for a few hours; anyway this is not really a question its just me asking for others story of hope and recovery from losing love. Please tell me how you got over your loss of love and that’s its going to get better…right????

    My Response:

    Dear Lost Love;

    Being told by the person you think you’re going to spend the rest of your life with that they don’t love you anymore is heartbreaking, world shattering news. It’s like a train runs you over and you can’t move. A brick wall is standing in front of you and you don’t know where to go. Truth is, even though it hurts right now, and even though you feel like you will always love her and only her, time passes and does heal all wounds. It is true what people say, it’s better now that you didn’t have kids together, it’s better now than 20 years down the road after you lived half your life together, it’s just better now. This is true, but it doesn’t mean it’s going to make you feel better about the situation. You have to think though, did you want to stay in a marriage full of lies, filled with someone you loved so much but doesn’t love you back in return? Don’t you think you deserve to be loved the way you love them? There is no big secret about how to move on, there is no “do this”; “do that”, and you will get over it. Everyone is different and we all move on in different ways. As for your drinking, if it’s to try to make the pain go away, then that’s a problem, drinking doesn’t solve sadness, it only increases it. If you are noticing that you are drinking more, than you should be able to control it. It’s not easy moving forward when you thought you already had your life planned out with someone, but this is a new beginning, you have a new job a new place a new life…Think positive, I know it’s hard, but I promise, things do get better.

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com