Just another WordPress site

Tag: love

  • I want to have an affair…

    The Question:

    I want to have an affair, but how do I find someone in a small town ?

    My Response:

    Dear Tempted;

    First lets start off with why have an affair? If you want to cheat on your spouse then there are certainly issues there that need to be resolved. Talk to your other half and try to fix things, if you feel there is nothing wrong but you just want to cheat then there is something wrong with the way you feel and think, and perhaps you need to move on from the relationship you are in. Second, a small town – you are only looking to get caught. Don’t cheat, it’s not worth it, and the person you are with I’m sure doesn’t deserve it.

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

  • Tomorrow’s your Big Day…

    Tomorrow’s your Big Day…

    Tomorrow’s your big day
    The day you tie the knot,
    The day you say I do,
    And forever be his glue.

    I see the way you look at him,
    The smile in your eyes,
    The way he looks at you,
    The love just shines.

    Tomorrow’s your big day
    I’ll stand right by your side
    I know your dad won’t be there
    but he’s watching from above,
    watching every step you take,
    and sending you his love.

    Tomorrow’s your big day,
    The day you tie the knot,
    The day you say I do,
    and forever be true.

    Tomorrow’s your big day,
    A marriage made by two,
    The day you fall in love again
    and say I DO…

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    © Written By: Kristin Nicole – 2011

    Dedicated to my best friend, my sister who I adore. I love you and I wish you nothing but the best filled with happiness and love. I love you.

  • My husband cheated on me with an 18 yr old…

    The Question:

    What do you do when you find out your husband cheated on you?
    I just found out a couple of weeks ago that my husband cheated on me twice with the same girl, a couple of weeks apart, three years ago. We were going through a serious rough patch, having only been married a year, fighting a lot, and I was being stupid and threatening to leave him. He was only 20, and I was 23, and we had a couple of friends that used to come over and hang out at our place a lot, one of them being this 18 year old girl. I thought she and I were good friends, I treated her like a little sister. I found out that she was infatuated with my husband, took advantage of the fact that he was afraid I was going to leave him, and , seduced him with a little alcohol and the whole I’m here and she is not. After the second time, he started distancing himself from her and the other friends, and eventually kicked them out altogether, me none the wiser. He has lied to me about it for 3 years, never telling me because he was afraid of losing me. Should I let it go or not?

    My Response:

    Dear Cheated On:

    Cheating is never tolerated, and even though she threw herself at him, he still had the power to say NO! With that said, men are also weak, this does not mean that what he did is okay by all means, but the fact that he distanced himself from that group and that girl shows he was A. Trying to avoid you finding out or B. He felt really bad and didn’t want anything to do with that group. Either way, he did what he did (although you were having problems at the time, again it still does not excuse what he did), but seeing it in a man’s point of view, I can see why he leaned more towards this 18 year old girl who was throwing herself at him. He was and still is very young, and mistakes are made. I would not condone him cheating and the fact that he hid this from you, but if he really loves you and you really love him and he never did it again with her after that (3 years ago) or anyone else for that matter, than it really is up to you if you can forgive him and move on. The big question is: Can you ever trust him again? If you can trust him and let this go and work on your marriage then do it, if you are going to throw this in his face and be angry with him about this all the time, then there are some hard decisions you may have to make down the road. I think you should definitely communicate about this and tell him how you feel, don’t hold anything in. You deserve someone that won’t cheat the first sign of trouble. He may be sorry but can you forgive him?

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

  • Renew our vows or tell him I don’t love him?

    The Question:

    My husband and I are supposed to renew our wedding vows in a few days but I am not in love with him anymore.? I am actually thinking of filing for a divorce. My husband is really making a big deal of the vow renewal thing, and has already paid for plane tickets for guests to come. We are supposed to have a big party afterwords, sort of an anniversary party with family and friends. He has invested a lot of money in it. Should I just wait until after everything is over before telling him I want a divorce, since he’s spent so much money already?

    My Response:

    Dear Renewing your Vows;

    You should have been honest with him before he spent all that money planning to renew your vows, now with that said, it’s too late, but it is better to tell him before hand than to wait afterwords, there may be a chance for him to get some of the money back on a lot of things. Your husband is probably going to be heart broken seeing as he is the one planning this, but do you really want to stand in front of family and friends and renew your vows to a man you no longer love? How can you live that lie? Step up and tell him how you really feel, he may not appreciate it now, but trust me, it’s better to tell him now than after the renewal of your vows. That is so much worse, he will feel like you really lied to him then, standing in front of everyone and looking him in the eyes only to be saying words that you really don’t mean. Step into his shoes for a minute, and how would you feel? Tell him the truth now, and hope that he can get some money/refunds back.

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

  • What would I have to do to get a divorce?

    The Question:

    What would I have to do to get a divorce? My wife cheated on me after two months of getting married, I know that is not love involved so please don’t hit me up side my head (I know what she did was wrong), please it took me some time to come here an ask for help I’m a good guy and I don’t deserve this. Please can anyone help me… (Modified question to make sense)

    My Response:

    Dear Married for 2 months;

    There are two options, if you want a divorce you can file it yourself by going to the courthouse in your area, and asking them what the process is to file for a divorce, (if you have been married for only 2 months you may be able to annul the marriage, which is easier and cheaper to do). If you have to get a divorce and you don’t want to file it on your own you can consult a lawyer. Get a few price ranges and whoever is best, if the two of you don’t have anything under your name together and no children then it should be fairly easy to get divorced. Sorry to hear that your wife cheated on you so soon after marriage, no one deserves that, just be happy you found out now rather than 10-20 years down the road. Get divorced and move on, you deserve someone who won’t do something like that to you.

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

  • Where did my sex drive go?

    The Question:

    Where did my sex drive go? I use to love to have sex and was always ready but after menopause I just do not have any sex drive anymore, what can I do? Advice please….

    My Response:

    Dear Menopause;

    “The loss of estrogen following menopause can lead to changes in a woman’s sexual drive and functioning. Menopausal and postmenopausal women may notice that they are not as easily aroused, and may be less sensitive to touching and stroking — which can result in decreased interest in sex.

    In addition, lower levels of estrogen can cause a decrease in blood supply to the vagina. This decreased blood flow can affect vaginal lubrication, causing the vagina to be too dry for comfortable intercourse.

    A lower estrogen level is not the only culprit behind a decreased libido; there are numerous other factors that may influence a woman’s interest in sexual activity during menopause and after. These include:

    * Bladder control problems
    * Sleep disturbances
    * Depression or anxiety
    * Stress
    * Medications
    * Health concerns” – you can find more information on this SITE

    I would consult your doctor and get advice on what you can do or what you can take to help get your sex drive back. Unfortunately our bodies go into different reactions when it comes to menopause and there is nothing wrong with this. You have noticed the problem which is the first step, now talk to a doctor and see what you can do to get that sex drive back.

    Good luck

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

  • Happy Valentine’s Day

    Another year gone by, and another Valentine’s is here. Not everyone is blessed to be in a relationship. Valentine’s day is said to bring a lot of depression and suicide rates up. People need to realize that Valentine’s day is just a holiday invented by people to celebrate your love, but you shouldn’t just celebrate it one day out of the year, you should celebrate your love 365 days out of the year. Okay well not exactly celebrate since you can’t buy gifts and go out to dinner every single day of the year, but you can celebrate it by loving each other, respecting each other, making memories that will last a life time.

    If you are couple go out, be romantic but don’t just do this special thing on Valentine’s day, go all out on a regular day, I think it would mean so much more than just because it’s Valentine’s Day. Don’t get me wrong, flowers and a gift is nice on Valentine’s day too…

    For those who don’t have someone to celebrate Valentine’s day with, why not go out with a friend, have some drinks, watch a movie. If you feel sad don’t fret, there is always next year.

    Happy Valentine’s All – hope you have a wonderful day!

    Here’s a poem I found:

    It’s More Than Saying I Love You

    We give on this day candy and flowers,
    But we never stop to say thank you for the many hours.
    You have stood by my side and gave a smile,
    As if to tell our hearts it’s been worth every mile.
    No need to buy a teddy bear or even a card,
    It’s pretty simple and not at all hard.
    Just put your arms around me and hold me tight,
    And say without words that in your heart all is right.
    You may say I Love You throughout the year,
    But on this day you need to make sure.
    The words so sweet and straight from your heart,
    That your life would be lonely without my part.
    So put forth the effort and take the time,
    Look me in the eye and say I’m glad you’re mine.
    ~By Marai

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    ~Happy Valentine’s Day~

  • My husband doesn’t want to have sex anymore…

    The Question:

    We have been married for 4 years and I am 25 years old and he is 28. I am sure my husband is still in love with me and tries to spend time with me as much as he can, and he is not cheating on me. But there is no sex drive between us anymore, the reason he gave for not showing interest in sex is that he’s got other ambitions to think about and he is not really into the sex any more.

    He was very passionate a year ago, and we had this financial instability for a while and since then it is changed. He cuddles with me and does everything just like in our newly wed days, but its been 3 months since we had sex… can anyone give advise other than going to therapist?

    My Response:

    Dear No Sex;

    If you don’t want to seek counseling I would recommend you first try to COMMUNICATE this to him. Sit down with your husband and tell him that you need to talk about the situation that you are in. Having other ambitions does not drive a man to not want to have sex, something else must be going on here. He is only 28, and I know many men at that age that are still driven as if they were 16 year old boys. 3 MONTHS is a long time, speak up and tell him what you want and what you need. Cuddling is cute and all but at the end of the day intimacy is so much more, and without it in your relationship things can go from good to bad. If you don’t think he is cheating on you, then find out what else it could be. You said that he mentioned he just wasn’t into the sex anymore? What is that about? How can a man not be into sex anymore, he’s only 28 for goodness sakes (Speak up because this is just not a good enough excuse). Most relationships where the man is not having sex can lead to a few different things (not necessarily cheating but it could be an option), he’s stressed over work, (and or you mentioned you had financial problems before) and maybe he’s still stressed over this and it is not totally fixed, this can make him a little too pre-occupied to think of anything else, or he is having some type of difficulty in the bedroom area and he doesn’t want you to know…either way which ever reason it is, it would need to be taken care of. So sit down and talk to your husband, don’t take the “I have too many things on my plate” excuse, we all do, but being together and working together in life is part of marriage.

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

  • Just separated, when should I date?

    The Question:

    Recently separated, how long until I start to feel happy again?
    I’ve been separated from my partner of 10 years, we have two children aged 3 and 5. Our relationship has not been working for 2 years now. It was more my decision to separate and due to this my parents are not talking to me. I feel so empty and hate the weekends when he has the kids, I have been warned not to start dating as it’s too soon and will not work out. I just want to know how long I’m gonna feel unhappy for?

    My Response:

    Dear Unhappy;

    It is always going to be hard because of the fact that you have children together, however with that said it has been 2 years since you have been having problems. If you don’t love your husband/partner anymore then you need to sit down with your parents and explain to them how you feel. At the end of the day, you need to live your life, and your parents aren’t always going to be here. They need to understand that if you aren’t happy in your relationship that you are not just going to sit back and stay while you are miserable. I am not sure how long you have actually been separated so I do not know when the appropriate time to start dating should be. There really isn’t a time period that anyone will agree with because of the fact that you have kids. You have to think about them, and you do not want to just bring about any person into their lives. Time will heal, and you won’t always be unhappy, you have to work at being alone, work at getting your life together with out the kids father in your life, repair your relationship with your parents, and when the time is right you will meet someone else. Don’t rush into it, life is short but you don’t need to rush into something you don’t think you are ready for. If you feel that you are ready to date, then go for it, I just wouldn’t bring the next guy around your kids unless it starts to become serious. Good luck.

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

  • My husband hurts me when he rejects me

    The Question:

    How do i tell my husband he hurts me when he rejects me?
    I’m 37 weeks pregnant and I know that sex at this point wont hurt the baby, only possibly encourage labor. The doctor has given the go-ahead and even recommended it. Four months ago my husband says that sex with me “isn’t the same”, which makes me feel so unappealing and fat that I cry almost constantly. It’s been so long and I know I have to wait at least 6 weeks after the delivery to have sex. It hurts me to think that the one man who should always be attracted to me just isn’t. I don’t know how to talk to him about these things because I don’t want to hurt him. He has always tried so hard to make me happy. I know he masturbates almost everyday and I also know he’s not thinking about me when he does, how do I confront him about this? I really need help!

    My Response:

    Dear Feeling Rejected;

    I know it’s hard but maybe your husband is just feeling a little awkward about having sex with you when you are almost ready to give birth, and even before that, it’s strange for some men to enjoy sex when they know their child is inside the mother. Some men do not know how to handle it or go about it and so it may feel like he is not attracted to you but maybe he just does not know how to proceed with the current “situation”. Talk to your husband and tell him how you feel, and tell him that you want to have SEX! Don’t be ashamed, you are not fat, you are pregnant, and once that baby comes you can get back into shape and be your self again. Don’t worry about hurting his feelings, you are the one pregnant with your emotions everywhere, if anything maybe he is scared to hurt your feelings, so tell him how you feel and remember don’t ever be ashamed to talk to your husband, I am sure he loves you very much.

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com