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Tag: scared

  • My girlfriend left me after 5 years…

    The Question:

    Dear Kristin Nicole;

    My girlfriend of 5 years just picked up and left. I love her but I don’t understand her. She wants to get married and I am not ready for such a commitment. I do want to spend the rest of my life with her, but I don’t know that I want to marry her. My parents were divorced, there parents were divorced and I don’t see why you need to get married in order to start your life together. How do I get her back, how do I convince her that I love her but I don’t know if I’ll ever want to get married? Please Help…

    ~Don’t Want to Get Married

    My Response:

    Dear Don’t Want to Get Married;

    I think your girlfriend has every right to leave you. You have been together for 5 years and you are telling her that you aren’t sure when you want to get married. Women want to grow and have a marriage and family and if you aren’t that guy then just let her go. Knowing that she wants to get married, you have a choice to make, either overcome your fear of marriage and get the girl you love and want to spend your life with back, or let her go and find someone who doesn’t want to get married. There are still women out there who don’t want to get married and living in a girlfriend/boyfriend status is fine with them, maybe this is the type of woman you need to look for. If you really love your girlfriend and you want to spend the rest of your life with her, then what is the big deal of not wanting to get married? Sure some marriages fail, but you won’t know until you try, besides just because your parents didn’t last doesn’t mean you won’t last with your girlfriend. Do what you feel in your heart, but don’t hold on to her if you know what she wants is marriage and a family and it isn’t something you want. If you can’t picture your life without her, then perhaps marriage isn’t as bad as you think it is….

    xo,
    kristin nicole

  • My fiance cheated on me with my best friend…

    The Question:

    Fiance Cheated on me and now we are through. What do I do now?
    We had been together 6 years and then she cheats on me with my friend and is with him now. I feel lost, don’t quite know what to do. I loved her very much and just in shock still of what has happened, was the last possible thing i ever thought could have happened. How do i make it through the days without her, what do i do now? How do I attempt to find someone after so long with her i don’t even know where to begin. Any advice is deeply appreciated.

    My Response:

    Dear Recovering;

    It’s hard, not only did your girlfriend who you thought you were getting married to cheat on you but she cheated on you with your best friend. The first thing you need to realize is your best friend, really was never a friend if he was able to cheat with his best friend’s fiance. Second your girlfriend is not worth being sad over if she just couldn’t tell you how she felt and ended things before going onto your best friend. You got hit here with a double wammy, not only did you lose your girlfriend but you lost your best friend the same day. You deserve better, you need to stop feeling sorry for yourself and realize that it was better to have lost her before you got married, I know it doesn’t make you feel better and the pain of loosing her isn’t just going to go away, but you need to stand up and be strong. Start hanging out with other friends and get back out there. I wouldn’t recommend getting back into a relationship so bad because you are still hurting, but go out there and start dating, have some fun and in time you will see that things happen for a reason. You may not see that reason now, but I promise that one day you will turn around and remember these words and you will truly see that everything happens for a reason.

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

  • In the end we all question life…

    Random Thoughts:

    In the end we all question life…

    We question what we could have done differently, we question life and the meaning, we question if we are truly happy with the choices we made in life. In the end we have to live with the choices we made in life whether or not we like them, because life is a journey none of us expect, a journey that takes you through the high mountains, the beaches, the sunsets, the storms and the unknowns.

    Life in general is scary, we are born into a world we do not know of, a world we can not control, and when you look back at the decisions we have made we sit and wonder if they were the right ones or the wrong ones.

    We learn that we cannot turn back time and no matter how much we hope to change the past or the future all we can do is walk straight into it and hope that what we are walking into, what will make us happy will be what we have worked so hard to get and we hope that all the tears and all the pains in life weren’t for nothing, and we hope that the scars caused by them will diminish and the walls built will crumble down and in a split second of wondering ‘how did I get here’ you stop and think about all the things in life that got you here, the people who tried so hard to steer you in the right direction, the hard choices you had to make in leaving or staying, and the wonder if life were different “where would I be”?

    I look back at my life and I wish I had made some different choices, but I do not regret life, I do not regret the road I chose because we cannot turn back time, we cannot regret the things we chose and the things we will choose, but we can guide ourselves and open our minds to the unknown, open our minds to things we did not think possible. We can open our hearts and minds to the wisdom the people around us convey, and we can listen and truly think about the decisions we will make. Decisions that can change your entire life in a single moment, decisions that can change your whole way of living and thinking and feeling. Open your eyes to the unknown, don’t be naive or blind or childish about the decisions you need to make in life. Life is short, and life is confusing and when the world seems to leave us alone in a single room with no room to turn to, you have to know that at the end of that room, there is always a door. A door filled with possibilities, a door filled with love and encouragement, a door filled with people that care for you, but if you choose to stay in that room, if you choose to close yourself off and believe that the world you are living in right now is real, this fairytale of illusions you have built for yourself, if you choose to believe only this, then you will choose a path that you will have to own up to for the rest of your life.

    In the end we all question life… but it’s up to you to be happy with the outcome and answers you make in life.

    xo,
    kristin nicole