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Tag: Sex

  • My Dad’s going through a mid-life crisis & he is scaring the heck out of me! What should I do?

    The Question:

    No joke I need advice. My dad is 53 yrs old and I believe he is going through a mid life crisis. He is starting to scare the heck out of me because he is NOT acting like himself. It seems like one minute he is OK and the next he’s get extremely upset or angry over little things. He’s criticizing himself all the time and sometimes my mother for no reason. He thinks he looks too wrinkled and now he’s getting botox injections (even tho we can’t afford it). Like I’m worried about him but he thinks I am over reacting?!? WTF (What the F***) did I do? I understand he’s getting older .he has some health and financial problems in his life but I would like to try to find a way to help him. Anyone else have this problem?

    I am 23 yrs old (turning 24 soon in August) but I feel like he treats me like I am an extremely naive, stupid and unsophisticated child. I live at home but I’m trying to help him pay for bills and living expensive with my part time job.

    I am telling you he is driving me f***ing crazy. What should I do? (no jokes please )

    My response:

    Dear going crazy;

    I know it’s hard because no one really knows what he’s going through, the only thing you can try to do is sit down with him when he’s in a good mood. Explain to him the way you feel about the way he’s been acting lately and go from there. If that doesn’t work, then just try to stay out of his way for right now, give him time to figure things out. You should also talk to your mom, maybe the two of you can sit down together with him and tell him that whatever he’s going through that the two of you are there to help. The only other thing I can tell you is move out. You said you had a part time job, is this because you are going to school? If you are continue doing what you are doing then, live at home and just try to do your own thing. Mid-life crisis is like a man going through menopause, the difference, women talk about it and men don’t so they decide to do all these crazy things that we just don’t understand. Try to communicate to him as delicately as you can so he doesn’t take it the wrong way, and if all else fails, just give him time and stay out of the way. Good luck.

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    Please leave comments.

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

  • I don’t like it when my GF sleeps with her husband…

    The Question:

    How can I gently tell my Girlfriend that I don’t like it when she sleeps with her husband? She did it twice last week and I’m beginning to feel like she’s just using me. HELP
    ~Feeling Used

    My Response:

    Dear Feeling Used;

    Let’s start off with what is wrong with this question….. “I don’t like it when she sleeps with her HUSBAND”….. HUSBAND….. Husband and did I mention HUSBAND? She is married, of course she is going to sleep with her husband, she is having an affair with you and she hasn’t left her husband yet, that should be a clear sign to get out. Well the first sign was the fact that she was MARRIED. The second sign is that she hasn’t left him for you and she is still sleeping with him. Find a woman that isn’t married, a woman that you can be with without hiding it from people, and a woman that will want to be with you and only you. Good luck

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

  • Is it wrong to feel this way about my wife?

    The Question:

    Me and my wife dated 7 months, got married, and now we are almost married a full year. We almost got divorced 2 different times, one was a week ago. She has a bad emotional past (family divorces, alcoholism in two fathers) and we don’t share much in common, we were attracted to each other sexually very much, and developed a friendship and evolved into love. Lately it hasn’t been good, past few months have been crappy. When it gets good though, I always seem to wish she would be this girl I have in my head, who wears dresses all the time and is extremely feminine and sweet. My wife never wears dresses (it sucks!) and is more “country” than “feminine city girl”. I knew this going in, but now I just wish she would be like that. What do I do? Is there a real girl out there to fulfill this need of mine or maybe just stick with my wife, who I have a relationship with and shared many memories with? I just don’t wanna miss out on anything in life. Sometimes it sucks because I like video games and good movies and she hates games and likes one type of movie. Also she always seems too “sick” or “hurt” to do anything or go anywhere fun. She is on meds for Arthritis and a couple other things. (we are both 22 years old). She also has self esteem issues, she is codependent on others too. I wish she was independent. She has had many jobs but quite them all for various reasons. any advice?
    ~Too Young

    My Response:

    Dear Too Young;

    It sounds to me like you got into this marriage way too fast. If you love her, try talking to her about how you feel, try perhaps marriage counseling. If you are staying with her just because you feel bad and you aren’t truly in love with her then maybe the best thing to do is go your separate ways. You are both very young and you have so much left to do in your life. If you don’t have any kids this is the easiest divorce that you can have, just split what you have and move on. There are many other women out there that you can have more in common with, next time though, don’t get married so quickly and really get to know the person you are with. No one is ever going to like the same things 100% of the time, but each person has to be willing to try and do the things their partner likes. If you love your wife, try talking to her first, maybe she would be willing to wear dresses more often and watch a different type of movie every now and then, if she really isn’t willing to try and you just aren’t in love with her anymore then you have a decision to make.
    Good luck.

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

  • Why Doesn’t my boyfriend want to have sex with me anymore?

    The Question:

    We’ve been dating for over a year now but in the last few months our sex has drastically decreased, at first it started to go down from at least 1-2 times a day for at least 5 months and then it went down to 1-2 times a week and then to 1-2 times a month and now it’s been a month and a half since we’ve had sex. I’ve read a few articles about this already, but none seem to fit my problem exactly. I was worried for a while that it might be me that was the problem but he told me it wasn’t and I know he wouldn’t lie to me. I’ve asked him about it but he says there’s nothing wrong. I just don’t know what to do anymore. He’s only a year older than me and he’s suppose to be in his prime. Is there anything I can do? I Haven’t pressured him or anything because I don’t want him to do it just to shut me up. I want him to want to, and I’m just not satisfied anymore and I’m not asking for everyday, at this point once or twice a week would be nice. As far as I know there’s nothing he’s stressed about at work or school, could it be a combination of the 2? or something else going on that I don’t know about? And please keep in mind that I am searching for help and advice and I don’t want to hear find a new boyfriend. I love him and I’m not leaving him, even if it means were not going to have sex anymore, but it’s frustration for the time being as I find it a tad odd that I want it more than he does, and I don’t really want to talk to any of my friends about it because I live in a small town and this is personal and I don’t need everyone talking about it, and the last thing I want him to feel is embarrassed. I haven’t told anyone of my friends but I’m in need of some advice. Any Ideas?

    My response:

    Dear no sex;

    Unfortunately we cannot read the minds of a man, and the only way to get answers is asking him. I know you asked him and he said everything was fine, but it obviously isn’t fine. Don’t feel ashamed to push a little, I know you said you don’t want him to have sex with you just to shut you up, tell him that, tell him you want him to want to have sex with you. You have needs too, and just like women, even if he isn’t in the mood, he needs to give it up sometimes. Sex is a very big thing in relationships, so I know you love him and you aren’t going to leave him, that you rather live without sex, well I’m sorry but this will eventually put a damp on your relationship. You need sex in a relationship it’s one of the many ways you show the attraction towards each other, the love that you two still share, without it, it can definitely cause problems. Open up to him, try coming on to him, put on a lingerie and call him into the bedroom. (Have you tried any of these things?) I know for a women, him not wanting to have sex is like a rejection because we don’t expect men to not want to have sex, but this is normal in some men, the stress from work or school like you stated could be a reason why he’s so pre-occupied with working late in the office and falling asleep in the office. This isn’t healthy for your relationship though, and you need to talk to him about this. I don’t want to say he’s having an affair, but sometimes this is the case in a man not wanting to have sex anymore with his girlfriend or wife. This could be far from the case, I am not sure how your relationship works and if he’s away from home a lot or not, I just have to put that out there as a result to him not wanting to have sex with you. As I stated though, there can be many more reasons other then an affair. If you want your relationship to work you need to communicate, that is the biggest step in trying to figure out what is wrong and getting back a little sex in your life.

    So lets review:

    1. Talk to him (Don’t be afraid that he’ll just have sex to shut you up). He needs to know how you feel.
    2. Dress up, come on to him, don’t sit around waiting for him to come to you.
    3. If all else fails… Communicate! (SEX is very important in a relationship). Don’t hold back, you deserve someone who will fulfill your needs.

    Good luck…

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    This was an old post I found on Answers.Yahoo.com

  • Jump into the Jacuzzi with Ex or Current BF?

    I was scanning the web when I bumped into this article “Ask Kitty” the Title “Kitty Jumps into the Jacuzzi”.

    The women wrote as follows:

    “My company has a Jacuzzi on the 15th floor of our office building and I’m dying to try it out. There is a special guy in my life, but I’m thinking water sports should involve someone I can get wild and crazy with, i.e., my biker ex-boyfriend. Prior to our breakup, I promised him a romp in the tub, but we never got around to it. Would it be super-scandalous if I took him up there instead of my bf? And do we need to use a rubber? My bff told me the hot water will kill the sperm. A baby would be a clear indication I’ve cheated.” (you can find the link below, if you want to see Kitty’s response). ~Juana Getwhet

    My Response:

    Dear Juana,

    First I would like to acknowledge the fact that you stated you had a best friend who told you hot water will kill sperm. First tell your friend to take some classes on “how to get pregnant”. YES, You can get pregnant in water, jacuzzi, pool with chlorine, any type of water anywhere that you aren’t using protection you can get pregnant. (Water will also not stop any transmitted diseases). I advise you get on a birth control pill because using a condom in the water can easily break. (Remember birth control pills also won’t help with transmitted diseases). BTW…(Sorry if I’m too blunt, but I don’t want you to make a mistake that you’ll later regret). As you indicated “A baby would be a clear indication that you cheated”. Along with many other responsibilities you’ll have to deal with later. Now back to the rump in the jacuzzi with someone who is “wild & crazy”. Have you even tried talking to your current man about getting wild & crazy in the jacuzzi on the 15th floor? How do you know he won’t be up for it? I guarantee any man wouldn’t pass an invitation like that up. If by chance he does turn you down, maybe you should re-think him being your man. My only other concern is the fact that just because your ex and you had discussed doing something like this, why would you even give him that chance to do that with you now that he is your EX? Perhaps you aren’t quiet over you ex? Issues we wold have to discuss another time.

    In Conclusion:

    Talk to your new man and have that wild & crazy night in the jacuzzi with him, not your Ex. And remember to always use protection.

    XO,
    Kristin Nicole

    If you want to read what Kitty’s response was you can link Here.

  • It’s been 12 years & NO SEX!

    The Question:

    What do you do when you’re really sick of being married?
    I’ve been married 12 years, but my husband and I have never had sex. He can’t. He doesn’t even try anymore (he never really did). We separated for 4 years because of it. People say he must be gay… We got back together a few months ago because I felt divorce is a sin…And sit or get off the pot, ya know. But nothing’s changed. I thought I could deal, but now I don’t know. What’s worse, he’s dirty and messy. He doesn’t shower or brush his teeth enough. I look at him and think Ick. I’m turned off but still don’t want an eternity of celibacy. Sigh…I really don’t want to hurt him. But I’m only 38 and I’d like a normal sex life.

    What can I do?

    My Response:

    Dear Celibate;

    I normally say try to work out, communicate with him what you need, but 12 years is a long time, why you stuck it out this long is beyond me, and why you married a man that wasn’t at all affectionate or intimate with you is also beyond me. You said you have never had sex with your husband? I am not sure what to say about this…. He either has issues with his member or he is in the closet, but why he would stay in a marriage where neither of you is happy is again “BEYOND ME”…. I know you think divorce is a sin, but you are still young, and no one should live in a marriage where they aren’t happy, where they are celibate from their own marriage, you are missing all the fun, all the intimacy moments to have with your spouse, to share and love and grow. You are still young, you need to move on, get out there and find a man that knows how to satisfy your needs. You need to LIVE, we only live once and life is too short to stick around someone you aren’t even happy with. Like I said I normally say try to work things out if you love him, and communicate, but this looks like a lost case (12 years) is a long time, it’s time to get off the pot like you said, and move on! Love yourself and find a man that will love you back.

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

  • My friend had sex with her brother…

    The Question:

    Parents what would you do if your son, and daughter had sex? Just wondering?
    I know a friend of mine who had sex with her brother she told me, and I want to know if I were to tell, what parents would do in general in that kind of situation?

    My response:

    Dear Teen with a big secret;

    I am not a parent but I am an older sister to my 16 year old sister. It is a scary thought that your kids may be having sex and to find out that they are I couldn’t imagine. BUT…. Yes…But…..it is going to happen one day. I don’t agree with having sex at such a young age and I do think that you really need to think about it before doing it. Most boys just want to have sex and nothing more, and the minute the girl gives it up the boy is gone. I know this happened to a lot of my friends in high school. If you are a parent that just found out your son or daughter is having sex or had sex, the only thing you can do is try to NOT to overreact. Try to talk to them about all the consequences, like diseases and about teen pregnancy. If you have a boy buy him condemns and explain to him about all the things that can happen along with respecting girls. If you have a girl, I think it is a lot harder, you can either get her on birth-control (Most parents think this is just giving the OKAY to have sex) but it’s better than the alternative…(Pregnancy), and you need to talk to her and explain all the the bad stuff that can come with having sex at such a young age. In the situation that your friend had sex with her own brother, that is just plain WRONG! That is incest and it can be that the brother raped her or molested her. If she had sex with her own brother willingly, that is wrong on all levels and either way they need help. In that situation I am not sure what the parents would do, they need to talk to both of them and find out exactly what happened and why. They will then need to have a lot of counseling. This is not normal and I hope your friend knows this. I hope she can get the help she needs and I hope her parents are strong enough to deal with something like this. Good luck….

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

  • I want a threesome with another man & my husband

    The Question:

    Is there any possible way, that I can make my husband Steve let me have a three-some with another guy. So it will be Me, Steve, and another “go getter”. He is usually open about his sexuality since he is a homosexual. Excuse me if this gets a little graphic but I always wondered how it would feel for 2 things to be in 1 hole. This sounds very dirty and I’m sorry if I offend anyone its just been a long time fantasy for me. Any tips or advice for how I could work it into the conversation? Any tips to make it happen?
    — Waldo

    My Response:

    Dear Waldo;

    Well first off your husband is a homosexual and you married him anyway and he married you? I’m sorry are you a man or a woman? Sorry if I sound a bit rude, but I am just baffled by this question. Okay back to the question on hand….How to go about bringing up the conversation, if you have always been sexually honest with your husband than just bring up your fantasies and ask him what he would think about a threesome with another man. Then go from there, if he says he is not comfortable with it you should respect his wishes and maybe try buying a toy that will semi-satisfy the whole 2 things in one hole. If he says yes, then you have to take into consideration that your husband may like the other guy more than he likes you, and are you ready to accept that. (Of course this could be far from what happens) but you have to make rules as to what you both want before doing something like this. In personal experience, I have never nor ever wanted to have a threesome with another man. My man is my man only and I do not share under any circumstances but that’s just me.
    Go for it if it’s what you really want and just come out and say what you feel. Good luck.

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

  • I have an outrageous fetish…

    The Question:

    I have a fetish that I am wondering if anybody else has heard of. I absolutely love a woman when she is dressed up in a dress or costume that has giant puffy sleeves. I’ve had this my whole life and don’t know where it came from. I fantasize that a woman or even better two women dressed up kidnap me and forcibly dress me up in the same kind of outfit. I’m bound and gagged while they forcibly rape me. Is there any women out there that would do this for there husbands. I don’t even need the fantasy part all the time I would just like it for my wife to dress up once in a while, prance around just to turn me on. I’ve been married for 20 years and she isn’t in to it at all. Am I really that weird? And I’m not gay I love women! Does anyone know of movies or websites that may have pics of such costumes?

    The Response:

    Dear Fetish;

    A lot of people have fetishes, have you ever talked to your wife about the way you feel? You have been married for 20 years, and your sex life should be open by now. Maybe your wife feels weird dressing up for you, try having a few drinks to loosen up and then trying a few different things, warm her up to dressing up for you. As for going to websites to indulge in your fetish, I don’t think that’s a good idea, your wife might not understand or feel happy about that. Talk to your wife and see how far she is willing to go and start there. Unfortunately these are things you should have told your wife a long time ago, and if you did and you knew she would never live your fantasy out, then you knew up front she wasn’t into it and you had choices you could have made, now at this point in your life you have been married 20 years, so start off with spicing it up a little in the bedroom and trying to see if she’s willing to dress up a few times. Good luck.

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com

  • How do I convince my husband?

    The Question:

    Well every time I want to do something nice for him example…give him a good massage after work, buy him a gift, do something that I know he will like he thinks that I have some hidden intentions or that I want something in return for the things I do. I tried numerous times to explain that I do it because I love him, I want him to be happy, that there is no hidden meaning / ulterior motives behind my actions but he is so doubtful!!
    What can I do to remove those unfounded doubts which kills me! I wonder..who wouldn’t be happy to have a good head, foot or back massage after work?

    My Response:

    Dear Massage;

    I have to agree with you on this one, I am not sure who wouldn’t want a massage after work, with that said have you tried having a serious conversation with your husband when it comes to him feeling this way? Try sitting with him and talking to him about how you feel and why you like to be attentive to him. Have you always been this way through out your relationship, or is this something you are all of a sudden doing? If it’s something new, it may explain why he feels you are being this way to get something out of it, if you have always been this way then he should know this is how you are and that there are no ulterior motives. If this is the case, then maybe there is something more behind him not wanting the attention. Have things changed recently in your relationship? Has he been acting weird in anyway besides not wanting attention? These are all things you should look into and ask yourself. If nothing has changed and this is your only worry, you have two choices. One – Talk to your husband and tell him that he makes you feel bad when you are trying to do something nice and he thinks that it’s only because you want something in return. Or Two – Don’t offer to do nice things anymore and see if he misses them afterward.
    Good luck.

    xo,
    kristin nicole

    I found this question on Answers.Yahoo.com